12/16/11 I desegree with the Death Penalty. My first reason is because the death penalty cost too much money. My second is because innocent people could die. My third reason is because they wont stop. These are the reasons why i am against death penalty.
My first reason why I am against death penalty is that it costs alot of money. The death penalty system cost $137 million per year in California. The life time incarceration would be $11.5 million per year. If California wouldnt have the deaht penalty California could save $1 billion over five years by replacing the death penalty with permanent imprisonment. California hasnt executed anyone since 2006 and they have 700 immates on death row. It cost about $2 million per case. California spends $90 Million and beyond the ordinary costs of the justice system on capital cases. $78 million of that total is incurred at the trial level. California Governor Gray Davis proposed building a new $220 million state of the death row. iGot the information from deathpenalty.org and ktla.com. All the money that they are waisting to put people on death row, they could save it for any other services. The Government has to pay for school's & other services. They just put guilty & innocent people on death row and waist about $2 million per case! It is better to save up the money for more important stuff that people need and that is usefull. [I'M GLAD THAT YOU TOLD ME WHERE YOU GOT THE INFORMATION, HOWEVER YOU DIDN'T WRITE QUOTES AREOUND THE PARTS THAT YOU TOOK " ". YOU HAVE TO DO THIS... YOU ALSO HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO WRITE THINGS IN YOUR OWN WORDS]
My Second reason is because that the person who they are accusing a suspect who was there once the victim was killed. And sometimes they kill the inconnent person. The defendant Carlos DeLuna was executed for the fatal stabbing of Texas convenience store clerk Wanda Lopez in 1983. DeLuna's guilt points to another man. His name is Carlos Hernandez had a record of similar crimes and it confessed to the murder. Carlos DeLuna was killed for Carlos Hernandez crime. Carlos DeLuna was executed in 1989. [SAME HERE]
My third reason is because even if they kill the muder that will not bring back the victum. So instead of waisting $2million on one case that t These are the reasons why I diagree with the death penalty. First it cost way to much in any state in California it cost $137 million per year, califrona sepents 90 million every year and they waist . Second some inocent people get put to death for a murder they did not commite last year 17 men that were imates were innocent on death row 115 people have been released on death row since 1973. My third reason is because they kill the muder but when they do it wont bring the victum back to life. So they actually wasted $20 million. These are my three reasons why I say that the death penalty shouldn't be in any states.
Writing Rubric
1-Developing
2-Emerging
3-Proficient
4-Exemplary
Ideas
No main idea, purpose, or central theme exists; reader must infer this based on sketchy or missing details
Main idea is vague; maybe broad or simplistic
Main idea is well-marked by quality details but could benefit from additional information
Main idea is clear, supported, and enriched by relevant anecdotes and details
Organization
Hard to follow; needs much re-ordering
Some out of place information; attempt at structure
Order works well with topic and purpose; strong leads, thoughtful transitions
Flat language or thesaurus overload; author searches for words to convey meaning
Impaired meaning but now and then a “juicy” phrase or some “salsa” (Missing at least one strong very, quality adjective or “ly” word per paragraph)
Precise, vivid, natural language; striking, fresh phrases (Most paragraphs have more than one strong verb)
Powerful, stunning verbs; you want to read it more than once to savor the words (Many strong verbs and quality adjectives in piece)
Sentence Fluency
Awkward enough to make reader stumble, re-read often (Relies too much on one particular type of opener)
Mechanical, but still readable; repetitive beginnings (A few different sentence openers)
Easy going flow, highly readable, purposeful sentence beginnings (Different sentence openers and some transitions)
Skims, sings, dances along like a lively script; easy to read with inflection (Many different sentence openers and excellent transitions)
Voice
Author is incapable of personalizing at this stage due to struggling with idea
Author’s voice is hard to recognize, even if reader is trying desperately to “hear” it
Author attempts to address topic, purpose, and audience in sincere and engaging way; piece still skips a beat here and there
Author speaks directly to reader in individual, compelling, and engaging way that delivers purpose and topic; although passionate, author is respectful or audience and purpose
Noticeable, distracting errors that may affect meaning
Author has reasonable control over standard conventions for grade level; conventions are sometimes handled well; at other times, errors distract and impair readability
Errors are few and only minor editing is needed to publish
IDEAS - 2- ORGANIZATION - 2 WORD CHOICE - 2 SENTENCE FLUENCY - 2 VOICE - 2 CONVENTIONS -2 Comments/Next Steps: - TOO MUCH USE OF THE WORDS OF OTHERS... YOU HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO WRITE THINGS IN YOUR OWN WAY. YOU CANNOT JUST TAKE THE WORDS OF OTHERS AND USE THEM
Level -Level 2-
Grade - 60%
12/9/11
Capital Punishment is a punishment that results in death of the convicted immate. Against Capital Punishment is when you dont agree with people getting send to jail for murdering someone and they should not deserve being in there. I am against capital punishment because it is usless and it doesnt bring the victim back to life, and the prisoners family must not sufferfrom not seeing there loved one's put to death and it also cost alot of money. The death penalty system cost $137 million per year. The lifetime incarceration would be $11.5 million per year. I am also against it because the person who is getting accuesed for the murder of the person may be innocent. 1,188 people were executed in the U.S from 1977-2009.
LEVEL 2 - 65% YOU DON'T EXPLAIN YOUR DETAILS... THE FACTS ARE FOR WHERE
I desegree with the Death Penalty. My first reason is because the death penalty cost too much money. My second is because innocent people could die. My third reason is because they wont stop. These are the reasons why i am against death penalty.
My first reason why I am against death penalty is that it costs alot of money. The death penalty system cost $137 million per year in California. The life time incarceration would be $11.5 million per year. If California wouldnt have the deaht penalty California could save $1 billion over five years by replacing the death penalty with permanent imprisonment. California hasnt executed anyone since 2006 and they have 700 immates on death row. It cost about $2 million per case. California spends $90 Million and beyond the ordinary costs of the justice system on capital cases. $78 million of that total is incurred at the trial level. California Governor Gray Davis proposed building a new $220 million state of the death row. iGot the information from deathpenalty.org and ktla.com. All the money that they are waisting to put people on death row, they could save it for any other services. The Government has to pay for school's & other services. They just put guilty & innocent people on death row and waist about $2 million per case! It is better to save up the money for more important stuff that people need and that is usefull. [I'M GLAD THAT YOU TOLD ME WHERE YOU GOT THE INFORMATION, HOWEVER YOU DIDN'T WRITE QUOTES AREOUND THE PARTS THAT YOU TOOK " ". YOU HAVE TO DO THIS... YOU ALSO HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO WRITE THINGS IN YOUR OWN WORDS]
My Second reason is because that the person who they are accusing a suspect who was there once the victim was killed. And sometimes they kill the inconnent person. The defendant Carlos DeLuna was executed for the fatal stabbing of Texas convenience store clerk Wanda Lopez in 1983. DeLuna's guilt points to another man. His name is Carlos Hernandez had a record of similar crimes and it confessed to the murder. Carlos DeLuna was killed for Carlos Hernandez crime. Carlos DeLuna was executed in 1989. [SAME HERE]
My third reason is because even if they kill the muder that will not bring back the victum. So instead of waisting $2million on one case that t
These are the reasons why I diagree with the death penalty. First it cost way to much in any state in California it cost $137 million per year, califrona sepents 90 million every year and they waist . Second some inocent people get put to death for a murder they did not commite last year 17 men that were imates were innocent on death row 115 people have been released on death row since 1973. My third reason is because they kill the muder but when they do it wont bring the victum back to life. So they actually wasted $20 million. These are my three reasons why I say that the death penalty shouldn't be in any states.
ORGANIZATION - 2
WORD CHOICE - 2
SENTENCE FLUENCY - 2
VOICE - 2
CONVENTIONS -2
Comments/Next Steps: - TOO MUCH USE OF THE WORDS OF OTHERS... YOU HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO WRITE THINGS IN YOUR OWN WAY. YOU CANNOT JUST TAKE THE WORDS OF OTHERS AND USE THEM
Level -Level 2-
Grade - 60%
12/9/11
Capital Punishment is a punishment that results in death of the convicted immate. Against Capital Punishment is when you dont agree with people getting send to jail for murdering someone and they should not deserve being in there. I am against capital punishment because it is usless and it doesnt bring the victim back to life, and the prisoners family must not sufferfrom not seeing there loved one's put to death and it also cost alot of money. The death penalty system cost $137 million per year. The lifetime incarceration would be $11.5 million per year. I am also against it because the person who is getting accuesed for the murder of the person may be innocent. 1,188 people were executed in the U.S from 1977-2009.
LEVEL 2 - 65% YOU DON'T EXPLAIN YOUR DETAILS... THE FACTS ARE FOR WHERE